As a "strong, independent woman" who is content spending her days at home watching crime documentaries and the Lord of the Rings Extended Edition on repeat, getting (back) into the dating scene is hard.

Despite the numerous dating apps available, finding someone to talk to and spend time with can be daunting.

During the Covid-19 pandemic, when people were forced to stay inside their homes, dating apps became especially popular for meeting new people. Initially, I tried Tinder, but after receiving numerous unwanted and unsolicited d*ck pics — to the point of desensitization — I decided to try a different dating app.

Enter Bumble.

Bumble is an online dating and networking app that lets women make the first move to message their matches. At first, it seemed like a liberating concept, but for an introvert who hates making small talk, the idea of saying "Hi" to someone makes me want to vomit.

However, I soldiered on.

I found interesting matches that started off alright enough to last into talking stages, but nothing more after that. As a Gemini, I need intellectually stimulating conversations, not the usual "Musta?," "Kumain ka na?," and "Ano na ginagawa mo ngayon?"

Please. (eye roll)

Am I asking too much? Maybe. Yes.

Am I delusional? Maybe. Also, yes. Definitely, yes. You can even ask my current boss.

But then something bad and personal happened during the pandemic that made me stop using the app.

Fast forward to a few years, tired of being lonely and having no one to talk to outside of girlfriends who I didn’t want to burden with my emotional vomiting, I tried Bumble again.

This time, my issue was that I realized the men who liked my profile did so because I disclosed that I was a person with a fuller figure. What's wrong with that, you may ask? In my mind, being fetishized for a certain size and weight is a red flag because I don’t want to be seen as only that. If I'm going to date someone, it's because we both feel a connection during our chats. I won’t waste my time, effort — and safety — on someone who sees me as just a way to fulfill their fantasies.

Again. Am I asking too much? Maybe. Yes.

To quote Ariana Grande, "Thank u, next!"

But believe it or not, after several swipes and "ka-talking" stages, I found someone worth talking to daily without any judgment or fatigue. The conversations were stimulating enough, but at the same time, silly enough for us to determine we had the same sense of humor and interests.

We mostly bonded over discussions on movies. We both liked the same Batman animated film (Batman: Mask of the Phantasm is the best one, in my humble opinion), we both thought Michael Keaton was the best Batman, and we bonded over Mel Brooks' films.

Unfortunately, as they say, all good things must come to an end. After a year, I got burned. Again.

So, I stopped using the app — until this year when work friends (who shall remain nameless... for now) opened my Bumble account and began swiping on randos.

As if that wasn't bad enough, they also sent messages to those who matched my profile (I am so sorry! It was not me, it was them!).

This triggered my profile to become active again after months of inactivity. Since then, I've been receiving notifications that my profile was liked. So far, I have chatted with some matches but have ignored — or ghosted — others.

Currently, the number of people who liked my Bumble profile is climbing. As of this writing, it is nearing 300 likes — all thanks to my colleagues who keep going through my phone, opening the Bumble app, and swiping!!!

Curiously, the majority of the men who liked my profile are a good 10 years younger than me (WHYYY???). For full disclosure, I’m in my late 30s. Other likes are from foreign nationals. I have no idea how the analytics are "analyticing," but I do not have the mental or emotional capacity to go through all of them right now.

Tips on surviving Bumble

Given my history (aka failure) with the app, I will not pretend to be an expert on it or on the subject of online dating. However, I will share some tips on how to navigate the app based on the profiles I've seen on it and my experiences.

Fake profiles. Be cautious of profiles that seem too perfect or lack detailed information, as they might be fake accounts created to scam users.

Catfishing. People may use stolen photos and false identities to present a different persona than who they truly are.

Pressure to move off-platform quickly. If someone tries to immediately move the conversation to text, social media, or other platforms without getting to know you well on Bumble first, be wary.

Unwanted sexual advances. Be prepared to encounter individuals who may send inappropriate comments or messages. Use the reporting feature if you feel uncomfortable.

Scammers seeking personal information. Do not share sensitive details like your home address or financial information too early in the conversation.

Misuse of Bumble modes. Be aware that some users might try to use Bumble BFF or Bizz to find romantic connections, which goes against the intended purpose of those modes.

How to stay safe on Bumble:

• Verify profiles. Use Bumble's photo verification feature to ensure you are interacting with real people.

• Meet in public places. Always arrange to meet in a well-populated, public location for your first date.

• Tell someone about your plans. Inform a trusted friend or family member about who you are meeting and where you will be going.

• Trust your instincts. If something feels off about a match, don't hesitate to block and report them.

• Use the reporting feature. Bumble provides a system to report suspicious activity, harassment, or inappropriate behavior.

• Take your time. Get to know someone gradually before sharing personal details or moving to a more private setting. Additionally, take the time when it comes to online dating. No one is rushing you to finally date or be exclusive with someone from Bumble.

So, would I recommend Bumble to others, given my lack of enthusiasm and scorned experience?

It really depends on the person. You do you.

I’ve had both good and bad experiences with Bumble. Finding love — whether online or in real life — is always a gamble. But that’s the nature of love. You have to take chances, and sometimes they work out, and sometimes they don’t. What matters is that you’ve tried.