The hand that identifies us

The hand that identifies us | Daily Tribune

As the ceremony ended and everyone went about the rest of their day, I found myself carrying that thought with me. It led me to a simple question.

What truly identifies a Filipino?

That question, in turn, brought to mind a small habit of my own, one that has occasionally drawn curious looks. Every now and then, my hand instinctively reaches for that of an elder in pagmamano.

Sometimes it surprises those around me, especially in formal settings. As a Muslim, I understand why some in the community choose differently. Among Muslims, there are sincere scholarly views that reserve every gesture resembling submission for Allah alone. Others understand mano simply as a Filipino expression of respect. The discussion deserves understanding rather than judgment.

Yet I eventually realized that pagmamano was never the question. It merely pointed me toward something larger. Perhaps what identifies a Filipino is not a single custom, but the values that those customs quietly carry.

Perhaps it is pakikipagkapwa (solidarity) beyond impersonal efficiency. Efficiency matters, but people are never transactions. We remember names. We ask about family. We notice when someone is carrying more than work.

Perhaps it is hospitality beyond transactional service. Whether welcoming a guest into a home or assisting a stranger across a counter, Filipinos have a way of making people feel they belong before any business begins.

Perhaps it is respect beyond hierarchy. Families, schools, businesses and governments all need structure. But respect should travel farther than an organizational chart. Before recognizing another person’s position, a Filipino first recognizes another person’s humanity.

One tradition I have long admired among many Filipino Muslims, particularly Maranaos living far from their homeland, is the effort they make to attend a tibao, gathering around a family that has lost a loved one.

I have seen people rearrange schedules, travel across islands and return home at considerable personal inconvenience simply to be present. They come because grief should never be carried alone.

Truth be told, this is a tradition I continue to learn for myself. That, to me, is culture at its finest. It is not performance. It is presence. It is the quiet conviction that another family’s sorrow somehow belongs to all of us.

National Culture Consciousness Week reminds us that preserving culture is not about freezing traditions in time. Nor does it require every Filipino to express them in exactly the same way.

Faith, conscience and circumstance may shape the form. But the virtues beneath them deserve to endure.

Whether a hand reaches for pagmamano, extends in a handshake, rests over the heart, comforts the grieving, or joins another in bayanihan, what identifies a people is not the gesture itself but the values it conveys.

Long after customs evolve and traditions take new forms, may those values remain unmistakably Filipino. For in the end, the hand that identifies us is simply the one that reaches for another.