Royal family’s hair-pulling

Nosy Tarsee heard something spicy about a certain blue-blooded clan, long whispered about due to the wife’s iron-fisted control over her family, still quietly splintering behind the scenes over a 12-year-old girl no one is allowed to mention in polite company.

The formidable wife, who spent years in the UK “indefinitely” while her husband stayed home playing lord of the manor, reportedly returned to a bombshell she could no longer ignore.

However, the matriarch, or her mom-in-law, issued one crystal-clear edict: the child born out of wedlock must be protected at all costs.

That order has turned the in-laws into warring camps, with hidden smirks and meaningful glances at every family gathering.

The attentive husband had a romantic fling with the girl’s mother, a discreet, in-demand stylist whose chair at a tony celebrity salon has seen more A-listers than most red carpets.

The affair, insiders claim, was no one-night slip; it was facilitated with almost embarrassing regularity.

That reminded many of the fall from grace of a once-trusted male aide who has since been banished from the inner circle, who had been branded the husband’s personal fixer, or, as the cruder mouths put it, his pimp.

Tensions finally boiled over when the powerful wife drew a very public line in the sand. She took all the couple’s properties and assets down to the last square meter and centavo, a move that sent shockwaves through their gilded circle. Twelve years later, the girl remains the invisible third rail — loved, hidden and still poisoning every holiday table.

Nosy Tarsee dares all and sundry to guess which storied family fortune is still paying for sins committed while the lady of the house was on the other side of the globe.