Here’s a fun little experiment: When you’re out dining at a restaurant, take a few moments to do a quick scan of the room. Chances are, if it’s a bigger group, there is one person who has taken the reins on the conversation, and is wont to let it go. At least not anytime soon. You’ll also spot someone whose attempts to weigh in are just a notch above feeble. In this age, literally and figuratively speaking, of free speech, the goal should be to give each person a chance to say “IMHO” at least once during a conversation.

Here’s the truth — all this is easier said than done, pun intended. Depending on your POV, there are ways you can politely chime in with “IMHO,” and also share the stage with everyone else at the table. Here are some tips that may help you get a word in edgewise:

Be direct and say, “May I say something now?” (or some variation of that phrase)

Oftentimes, just being direct is the best way to get your point across. Without being rude, that is. Just politely ask that you’d like a turn to add to the conversation. This gives the person speaking a subtle hint that they may have held the proverbial mic a bit too long.

Acknowledge what the speaker is saying, and open the floor to others

Now this will take a bit of active listening to pull off with panache. Once you get the gist of what the person is saying, you can jump in with “Oh you’re making a great point there, especially about….so what do you think?” while turning to another person at the table. This opens the floor for someone to speak up with an equally engaging thought or story of their own. Rinse. Repeat.

Switch the topic when the opportunity arises

Sometimes, conversations can dwell on one topic, especially if the talking is coming from just one person. The best way to break away from that is to jump in with a subject change —best done by paying attention to what is being said. For example, if someone going on and on ad nauseam about their favorite hobby, then maybe do a switcheroo by asking everyone else what they consider to be their “favorite.”

Just say their name.

Okay, this is a tip picked up from an article online. And it makes a lot of sense. Nothing gets someone’s attention than to calling their name. Just be sure you have a follow up statement to go with it, and keep the conversation moving, ideally by someone else.

Turning the tables

Of course, conversations go both ways! Which means, the onus is also on you as the person doing all the talking to know when to pipe down and let others speak their mind. So maybe give these tips a try lest you ramble away.

What are you trying to say?

That is a good place to start. Mind you, this doesn’t have to be a deep dive into the meaning life. Whether you’re recapping a trip, or talking about a fantastic restaurant you’ve been to, or some lifechanging hack, think about what you really want to say. Basically, the salient points that will get your message across — and get a good reaction all around.

Don’t get lost in the story

In a nutshell, self-awareness keeps everyone listening. Know when it feels like you’re hogging the conversation, and eyes are starting to roll. Think of your story as a highlight reel — where not all the minutiae need to be spelled out. Give your story a beginning, a middle and an end.

Be present in the moment

This was some sage advice handed down by a friend. And works for both sides of the conversation. Be present in the moment. Listen. Engage. Respond. React. By grounding yourself in the present moment, then your appreciation of all that is happening around you increases exponentially. It allows you to pick up on nuances from the person seated across the table. To notice when someone else has something to say. To fully enjoy just being there.

We all tend to forget that conversations are a two-way street. And the reality is that there will always be someone who will have the most to say. The trick is to get through to the end is little bit of awareness — from both sides.

For one speaking, it is being cognizant that as interesting as you may think your stories are, this is not a one-way conversation. For the one listening, it is knowing that they can, and should, take their turn to speak if they so desire. Given that we are part of a civilized society, to do so, as aforementioned, as politely as possible. The end result should then be that the evening draw to a close with everyone having the equal opportunity to opine about the subject matter at hand, and still depart as friends.