Beyond labels: Three faces, one motherhood

Society often distinguishes between biological mothers and stepmothers, as if love and care depend solely on blood ties. But for three women with different stories, the truth is clear: being a mother means the same thing — sacrifice, guidance and unconditional love — no matter how the children came into their lives.

A stepmother by heart

Elena Cruz, 40, is a stepmother raising children who are not biologically her own. For five years, she has taken full responsibility for their care but faces challenges unique to her role.

“My biggest difficulty is interference from relatives — grandparents, uncles and aunts. Every time I correct or discipline the children, they say I am too strict or remind me I am not their ‘real’ mother. But when it comes to feeding them, working for their needs, or staying up when they are sick, no one else is there but me,” Elena said.

She added that the burden is heavier because the children’s father cannot carry his share of the duties.

“He is present, but not capable. He cannot provide fully, he cannot defend me when his family criticizes me, and he cannot make firm decisions. I end up doing everything alone. People think being a stepmom is easier, but it is harder — I have to prove my love every day. But whether I gave birth or not, I take care of them, I worry for them, and I love them like my own. That is what matters.”

A working mom and a 'furmom'

Unlike Elena, Nina is a biological mother to a five-year-old boy and a working professional serving as a medical virtual assistant on the night shift. Aside from guiding her child in the digital age, she is also a “furmom” — a role she finds challenging but rewarding.

“Even at his age, he is exposed to gadgets and the internet. I limit his screen time, guide him on what to watch, and make sure we spend more time playing and talking together instead of him just facing a screen,” Nina said.

Her daily routine is demanding but steady. Working from 11 p.m. to 7 a.m., she manages her time to ensure both her son and her pets feel prioritized. In the morning, she prepares her son’s meals, personally drops him off at school, and tends to her “furbabies” before resting for her next shift.

“I treat our dogs like family, too,” she added. “It is tiring, but that is motherhood. Whether you are a biological mom or a stepmother, you always put them first. We all sacrifice time and rest for their well-being.”

Motherhood that never ends

For Juvy Baco, motherhood remains the same no matter how old the children grow. While four of her children are already married, her youngest, a 24-year-old son, remains single and lives with her. Juvy married right after college — an experience that taught her hard lessons she now uses to guide her children.

“Because I married young, I know exactly how hard it is to start a family when you are not fully ready or stable. That is why I am very careful and worried for my youngest son,” Juvy said.

She is acutely aware of the economic reality and the mindset of the new generation. “Prices are high, everything is expensive, and life is very difficult. He has a job, but his salary is just enough for himself — nowhere near enough to support a wife or children. Young people today also think differently; they want things fast, and sometimes they think they know better than their elders.”

She constantly teaches him about responsibility. “I tell him to think a hundred times before making big decisions. My job as a mother does not end just because my other children are settled. I want to make sure he is prepared and stable before he steps into that kind of life.”

Elena is a stepmother. Nina is a working mom and furmom. Juvy is a mother to grown children. One deals with meddling relatives and an incapable partner; one balances a graveyard shift with school runs and pets; one guides her adult son through the hurdles of a difficult economy.

Different circumstances, different struggles — but all three share the same reality. They provide, they guide, they sacrifice, and they love without condition. As their stories show, labels do not make a mother. Love does.