“Ang sakit,” a friend lamented hours after running the Milo Marathon last Sunday in Manila.

She, along with hundreds of other runners, myself included, ran the 42-kilometer distance in hopes of qualifying for the National Finals set in Cagayan de Oro this December.

While I am certain she was referring to physical pain and exhaustion after running through extreme humidity and heat, I could sense her heartbreak at not being able to meet the qualifying time for her age, which was four hours and 45 minutes.

Given her level of fitness and training, finishing within that time would have ordinarily been a breeze.

But the conditions that day were less than ideal. The temperature, even around the gunstart time of 1 a.m., was punishing.

The route, which required running uphill through two flyovers four times, brutally taxed both legs and lungs. And as we gasped for air, all we could inhale was the dark smoke belched by trucks and buses along Roxas Boulevard. That some of the aid stations ran out of ice and water didn’t help either.

Hours after the race, there was a maelstrom of emotions on my newsfeed.

There were those who were simply relieved that they managed to finish but there were a lot who poured out their frustrations, just like my friend. One bewailed that all the weeks of arduous training had gone down the drain just because he missed his target. Some even began blaming the race organizers.

Believe it or not, “the blues” are normal post-marathon. While a lot will experience a runner’s high upon crossing the finish line, it is not uncommon for runners to feel unhinged and even depressed after a race.

Author Stephane Lane, who wrote Long Run to Glory: The Story of the Greatest Marathon in Olympic History and the Women Who Made It Happen theorized that this is because we experience an uptick of the neurotransmitter dopamine during training until the day of the race. It makes us alert and more focused on the goal. However, once the goal is achieved (or missed) we also lose this dopamine fix. The more important the goal is for us, the harder the crash can be.

Another “happy” chemical, endorphine, also tends to plummet post race. The fact that the race didn’t go as planned may make it even harder to cope.

And that’s often where the rub is — unmet expectations.

Another writer and runner Peter Bromka wrote an excellent piece on the topic entitled, “The Marathon Doesn’t Owe You Anything.” He wrote: “The marathon is too far and too fickle to be tamed by your intentions.”

Indeed, a runner has to accept that no matter the training or preparation, there are many uncontrollable factors in running such a long distance.

Sometimes, it’s the weather, or an insidious cramp, or even an unexpected hump on the road that causes you to fall flat on your face. Another friend experienced a bum stomach during a downhill marathon, forcing her to go to the porta-potties several times — a particularly unpleasant experience, for sure.

But that there are so many uncontrollable factors that add to the challenge is part of what has drawn many to the marathon in the first place. These difficulties help build mental toughness and resilience.

Self-awareness is key. Once a runner has accepted the unexpected, an unmet goal becomes a lot less painful.

It also requires a change in perspective. Instead of thinking that the race is the realization of one’s hopes and dreams, the journey getting there — all those months of training — is actually the prize. That process of getting one’s mind and body primed is the goal and, the actual race, merely a celebration.

In all of it, there is never a guarantee of gratification.

As Bromka eloquently put: “(We) don’t play games for the final whistle. Don’t read books for the epilogue. The finish isn’t the affair…The point is the work; the commitment to transform.”

So, chin up runners. Time to sign up for the next race.