“ Before any party becomes the ruling clique most of its original members fit inside a UV commuter express van.

“One party in power and all others in jail!”

The quote is from an obscure 20th century revolutionary but it graphically says what all political parties secretly aspire for; even here in our blighted la-la-land where political parties are not exactly virtuous.

But by impaling themselves with warring factions, members of the current ruling party, the Partido Demokratiko Pilipino (PDP), might as well kiss this same secret dream of domination goodbye: to the obvious delight of other rival parties.

An amused lawmaker, for instance, of a rival party cheerily jeered that the self-inflicted wounds of the ruling clique might “erase the PDP from the political landscape.”

By now it should be clear what the PDP meltdown is all about. To sum up: in an “unauthorized” assembly two weeks ago a law school classmate of President Duterte, a Rogelio Garcia, assumed the leadership of a faction of the ruling party after the assembly ousted Sen. Aquilino “Koko” Pimentel III as the party’s president.

Pimentel branded the assembly as “fake” and most assembly participants as “usurpers.”

Sensing a crisis, President Duterte, exercised his powers as the party’s titular chair and called for a caucus within the month to ward off any meltdown threat.

Regardless of the outcome of the presidential mediation, the barbs between the protagonists tell us what the fight was all about.

On one hand, Pimentel admitted the fight was over the party’s expanding membership. Expansion is not a parochial interest as all political parties all over the world have but one abiding objective and ultimate goal: the growth of the party without limit.

“Politics is addition. You cannot hijack the party!” Pimentel hollered.

Hijack may not be apt as Garcia’s faction said it opposed Pimentel and ousted House Speaker Pantaleon Alvarez’s move to swear in some 300,000 new PDP members who they alleged did not go through seminars on the party’s goals.

“The traditional political parties, this is what they do: join the party, even if you don’t understand its purpose…That is why PDP was established – to discipline and correct the mistakes of the past,” Garcia said on the legitimacy of their cause.

In short, the fight was over the quantity of partymates as against the quality of partymates.

Of course, all this is amusing and while it is best to leave the PDP alone stewing in its own miseries, its story nonetheless tells us about the condition of all our political parties.

Anyway, while Pimentel and Garcia are at cross purposes about their party’s growth, both however tacitly agree their party must grow and the opportune time for growth is now. The two only differ on how fast it should grow.

As to why both feel now is the right time for growth, perhaps both are acutely conscious of the humorous nature of the growth and decay of our political parties in the post-Marcos era.

“The fight was over the quantity of partymates as against the quality of partymates.

It is a twice-told comic tale hereabouts that before any party becomes the ruling clique most of its original members fit inside a UV commuter express van.

Only when a member or a new recruit grabs the presidency does a party suddenly count enough members to fill a cockpit arena and much later on, enough card-carrying members to fill the cavernous Mall of Asia Arena.

The proviso, of course, is once a President’s term expires, his party also follows suit in expiring and once again remnants of the party fit inside a UV express van.

But this conventional narrative of our parties the PDP somehow flouts: the threatening meltdown is strange as President Duterte has yet three more years to go.

Perhaps another party, like presidential daughter Sara Duterte’s Hugpong ng Pagbabago is on the ascendant and is now the favored ruling clique? Perhaps.

At any rate, the shambles inside the PDP may portend a fate that the party is on its way to fitting once again in a van, sooner than later.

Whatever happens, it does seem the growth and decay of our political parties are cruel political facts and obviously PDP isn’t above it.

But growth and decay aren’t even some of the real issues with our political parties. They are just sideshows. In fact, the casual opinion treating our political parties as a longstanding joke is far more relevant to us.

A joke because, time and again, our political parties have shown that they are nothing but convenient vehicles of an ambitious individual’s drive for political power. It’s really to hell with a party’s political principles!

Which brings us to the sad fact that in our politics we are not actually making choices between various solutions as put out by political parties. But we are merely choosing among various individuals whose principles are suspiciously anchored on self-interest, irresponsibility and aggrandizement.

A reality which prompts us to ask if our political parties are of any use to us, that it may now be worth thinking of abolishing them. But that is for another time.