Dear Atty. Angela,
I am married to a man who is a severe introvert and is prone to intense jealousy. We have been in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship since college but his attitude worsened when we got married.
He was jealous of everyone I talked to and he would even skip work to stalk me. He even poked a gun at his 15-year-old cousin who he suspected of being my lover. He would even force me into having sexual intercourse with him. Whenever I refused, he would get mad and quarrel, accusing me of having an affair. He repeatedly verbally harassed me and eventually inflicted physical harm.
An expert psychologist diagnosed him with paranoid personality disorder manifested by his damaging behavior like reckless driving and extreme jealousy; his being distrustful and suspicious; his severe doubts and distrust of friends and relatives; his being irresponsible and lack of remorse; his resistance to treatment; and his emotional coldness and severe immaturity.
I can no longer stay in this toxic relationship and I would want our marriage annulled. Please help.
Dina
Dear Dina,
There is a legal basis to have your marriage annulled.
In the case of Tani-De La Fuente v. De La Fuente, Jr., G.R. No. 188400 (2017), the Supreme Court agreed with the findings of the psychologist where repeated acts of harassment, which show the husband's need to intimidate and dominate his wife, is a classic case of coercive control. At first, he only inflicted non-physical forms of mistreatment by alienating her from her family and friends due to his jealousy and stalking her due to his paranoia. However, jealousy soon escalated into physical violence.
Coercive control is a form of psychological abuse, which refers to a pattern of behavior meant to dominate a partner through different tactics such as physical and sexual violence, threats, emotional insults, and economic deprivation.
Article 68 of the Family Code obligates the husband and wife "to live together, observe mutual love, respect, and fidelity, and render mutual help and support." In this case, the petitioner and respondent may have lived together, but the respondent failed to, or could not, comply with the obligations expected of him as a husband.
After the wife had exerted efforts to save their marriage and their family, the husband simply refused to believe that there was anything wrong in their marriage. This shows that he truly could not comprehend and perform his marital obligations. This fact is persuasive enough for the Court to believe that the husband's mental illness is incurable and is a legal ground for annulment.
Atty. Angela Antonio
