April Fools’ Day is that one magical time of the year when people pull pranks, spread hoaxes, and generally make fools of their fellow humans — all in the name of good fun.
It’s a day dedicated to mischief, deception and trickery, when we momentarily question everything, we hear. Sounds familiar? It should, because in the Philippines this day isn’t confined to just 1 April. No, dear reader, we are blessed with an extended, government-approved version of April Fools’ that runs every election season, and quite frankly, throughout the entire year.
As campaign season approaches, the country transforms into a grand stage where politicians masterfully perform their greatest illusions.
Suddenly, roads that have been pothole-ridden since time immemorial are paved overnight.
Freebies and handouts rain from the heavens, like manna from Congress. The same officials who once hid behind tinted SUVs now shake hands with the common folk, carrying their babies like they were auditioning for sainthood.
And of course, in the spirit of April Fools’ mischief, they make grandiose promises that even the most gullible among us know won’t materialize — free WiFi for all, an end to corruption, a prosperous economy, and perhaps even a bridge from Manila to the moon.
But the real comedic gold isn’t just in the promises; it’s in the way our dear leaders handle the truth. If April Fools’ is all about deception, our politicians are grandmasters.
One day, a public official goes on live TV, declaring a bold stance on an issue. A few weeks later, when confronted about the very same statement, he or she develops selective amnesia.
“I never said that,” they would claim, despite the video footage, transcripts, and a thousand memes immortalizing their words. Executive privilege, they cry! Suddenly, the truth becomes a flexible, malleable concept, much like their campaign platforms.
Take, for example, the latest trend among government officials of twisting facts into pretzels so convoluted that even the most flexible contortionists would be impressed. When accused of anomalies, some resort to creative storytelling that would put telenovelas to shame.
“I was taken out of context,” they would insist, as if we all misunderstood their clear and repeated words. Others, when asked to testify in hearings, invoke the mystical powers of executive privilege — a magical shield that allows them to dodge accountability faster than a jeepney driver swerving through EDSA traffic.
And let’s not forget the greatest April Fools’ prank of them all — the way some politicians treat the electorate as if we are the punchline to an elaborate joke. Year after year, they tell us that our votes matter, that democracy works, that they are here to serve. But once the elections are over, the jokes take a dark turn. Taxes rise, scandals erupt, and yet, here they remain — unchallenged, unbothered, and untouchable.
So, every April Fools’ Day, let’s take a moment to appreciate the real pranksters in our lives: our dear politicians. Unlike the harmless tricks played on 1 April, their version of deception lasts far longer and comes with real-world consequences.
And yet, the biggest joke of all? We keep falling for it, election after election. Now, who’s the real fool?
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