Dear Atty. Peachy,
I have left my partner of five years because we constantly fight. I can no longer tolerate her physical abuse and hurtful words. As a man, I often find myself humiliated in front of her family. I made a deal with her that I would leave as long as she cared for the children. After a year of being separated, she is now threatening to sue me if I do not support our children. She currently does not have a job and relies on her parents. We are not married, and we have two children together. Can she file a case against me even though we are not married and are no longer living together?
Chris
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Dear Chris,
I understand that you have made the difficult decision to leave your partner due to a continuous cycle of conflict and emotional distress. In the midst of these challenges, you reached an informal agreement with your partner: you would step away from the relationship, and she would assume responsibility for the children. You believed this arrangement would relieve you of ongoing financial obligations. However, your partner is now asserting that she will take legal action if you do not provide for your children.
In the Philippines, child support is a mandatory obligation for both parents, regardless of marital status. Article 194 of the Family Code explicitly states that parents are required to provide support to their children in accordance with their means. This obligation persists even after separation or if the parents were never married. Therefore, even if you choose to distance yourself from your partner, your responsibility to support your children continues. Your partner can indeed pursue legal action to enforce child support if you fail to provide financially for your children.
While you may have made an informal arrangement regarding childcare responsibilities, such agreements can be challenging to enforce in a court of law. If your partner decides to seek legal recourse, the court may determine child support obligations based on your income, financial capacity, and the needs of your children. The law underscores that both parents have a shared obligation to prioritize their children’s welfare. Given your partner’s unemployment and reliance on her parents for support, the court may likely require you to provide child support.
While separation can be emotionally challenging, it is essential to recognize that your duty to support your children remains a legal priority under Philippine law. I hope you view providing support to your children not as yielding to your partner, but as fulfilling your responsibility to offer love and care to your own children.
Atty. Peachy Selda-Gregorio