The virtue of not trying

For our New Year story, I will tell you about a simple lesson I learned.

In school, we are taught to do our best. Best effort leads to success. But not always. There are exceptions. Let me tell you my experience. 

We had this championship match in a 9-ball billiard competition, narrowed down to four classmates out of 35. Having gone this far, I was intent on winning, of being the champ. I was a good pool player. My confidence was oozing.

Then it was between Mike and I to become the next 9-ball champ. I aimed, focused hard, taking long to make the shot, intent on beating him fair and square. And — I missed. When it was Mike’s turn, I was shocked. He did not even aim. He did not even try. He just took a three-second shot. No effort at all. Then he smiled. He was the champ. My heart sank.

During a basketball game, I missed two foul shots in the last two minutes, when we could have won by one point. Too much effort and I missed. If I had made no effort, I would have made the two shots and been the hero.

The coach said, “Too much effort generates fear that makes you miss your shot. Next time, be calm, erase all fears. Then take your shot.”

The lesson is simple. Too much effort and you miss the shot; no effort and you make the shot. The virtue of not trying. 

So, during one quiet evening of meditation, I wrote a verse: “Go with the flow. Do not resist the Lord’s wind to carry you to places where He needs you.”

And yet another evening, I wrote: “Do not resist. Flow with the wind. Do not grasp; touch lightly. When you grasp, the sand recedes faster from your hand. When you lessen your grip, the sand lingers. If you shout, it is harder for people to hear you. If you whisper, it is easier for them to hear you. 

“It is easier to understand things if you see them from behind the curtain where you are not seen. If you speak in the limelight, it is easier for you to be blinded by your own ego and mess up your message.”

Meditation begins with no thoughts. Confusion begins with too many thoughts. Be the still pool with no waves, like a mirror, so you gain insight. You discover new things when you start with no thoughts. Yoga meditation begins by removing all thoughts. In the beginning, it can be hard. A problem may disturb you. Removing all thoughts can be a problem in the beginning.

Look inside your soul, and you see darkness, for you are a mystery to yourself. Look outside at another soul, and you see blinding light, only because the other reflects your true self. You understand yourself by loving someone. You fail to see your true self by loving yourself. Your ego will destroy you.