Duterte Outsmarts Congress in Humorous House Hearing

Duterte Outsmarts Congress in Humorous House Hearing | Daily Tribune

It’s a fact: numerous scientific studies have shown that people with a highly developed sense of humor are demonstrably more intelligent. Differently stated, funny people are smart people. So it may be concluded that the obverse is true: persons who are humorless are also brainless.

That hypothesis and its antithesis was nowhere more in evidence than the latest hearing of the House of Representatives’ Quadcomm wherein they invited former President Rodrigo Duterte as, supposedly, a “resource person,” but with a premeditated agenda on the part of the House to treat him as an accused in cases of alleged mass murder.

As in the Senate, the plan backfired spectacularly. Whoever was the architect thereof was absolutely clueless, pitting a witty, outspoken and seasoned political veteran against a battery of mainly witless, dour and self-important neophytes and old-timers who remained political unknowns.

Even the optics were not good for the congressmen, especially those who intended the hearing to be a platform to launch their image nationwide. Imagine dozens of them ganging up on an aged yet very well-loved political personality such as Duterte in a mostly offensive manner. It did not help the legislators any that they chose, for their supporting cast, personalities who count among the most hated in the country.

There was former Justice Secretary Leila de Lima, universally derided for her flauntingly adulterous acts and allegations of corruption. So unpopular was she that in the 2022 polls, even with all the advantages of incumbency, she ranked a miserable twenty-second in her reelection bid, outpolled even by independents such as Larry Gadon.

Then there was perennial failed coup plotter Antonio Trillanes with his recycled tales of death squads and secret bank accounts long debunked as mere products of a bitter mindset. Add to that a slew of anti-Duterte wokes and snowflakes that included a drug-addict priest and a shrill lady lawyer known for representing communist front organizations, and you have a recipe for a political sketch that would put Saturday Night Live and The Onion to shame.

Duterte wasted no time running circles around them. He was effectively making fun of them, making them believe they had nailed him on a confession for multiple killings, calling their bluff on the International Criminal Court, and even calling them “stupid” to their faces, as Duterte’s rapidly shifting tones — from jesting to amiable to belligerent to deliberately vague — kept his would-be inquisitors constantly off balance.

Duterte had called them out early by emphasizing that the proceedings were in the nature of an inquiry in aid of legislation, and not a criminal investigation. The House members, however, were either too dense to understand him or disregarded that principle reiterated time and again by our Supreme Court due to a script that they had to hew to no matter what. But by being incapable of thinking on the fly, they not only failed in their design pitifully, but Duterte succeeded in holding a mirror to themselves for their hypocrisy and lack of intelligence.

The expressions on the faces of the lawmakers, after they realized they had been discomfited by the former president, were truly priceless. The best one was the smug look on the visage of a female legislator who looked so satisfied with what she thought was her legal acumen when she attempted to underscore the fact that Duterte had made an extrajudicial confession to crimes after making him admit to the elements of a valid one, only to realize later that in her misplaced excitement there was one missing piece, that of specificity: although the ex-President kept taunting them with earnest admissions of being a killer, he never named one particular person he purportedly killed.

Which made everything Duterte admitted to inadmissible in any court.

Ultimately, Duterte’s interrogators were made to look like buffoons. If those were the faces they sported after that comedy show, kung face ‘yun , they were far from pretty faces.