Boulevard of broken sleep

Boulevard of broken sleep | Daily Tribune

Maybe sleep deprivation has become a prerequisite for a career in advertising. Okay, that’s as charitable as we can get in describing that bunch of geniuses for the collective cultural lobotomy they just dealt Filipinos.

I mean, that or I’d be asking what kind of drugs those crass ad people were on when they decided they’d change to Gil Tulog the name of that iconic Makati City thoroughfare, Gil Puyat Avenue, otherwise known as Buendia. And without the mayor, Abby Binay, knowing about it, too.

In a fit of caffeinated delirium, Wellspring and its inspired marketing arm reduced to a sleep supplement punchline the legacy of a long-gone senator who, anyone can presume, had done enough to merit a road being named after him.

Mayor Abby’s not one to lose sleep over this brouhaha, and so she promptly ordered the signage to be changed back to Gil Puyat after the late senator’s descendants cried foul over the affront, a desecration of history as profound as it is pathetic.

But what’s in a name since the excuse given by Wellspring (Why? Has the ad company suddenly lost its tongue?) was that it was an attempt at wordplay, like puns represent the highest form of wit, which they are definitely not? Gil who?

From being one of those people who may have stayed up late passing laws, those brilliant minds in advertising decided to turn Senator Puyat’s memory from a boulevard of broken sleep into a slumber highway. How’s that, from doers to dozers? Funny, except no one’s laughing.

Alas, we’ve been through this Road to Perdition too many times before, with such ill-conceived marketing gimmicks that question the sensibilities and sensitivities of those behind them. What are they, a bunch of kids being allowed to run around and run us over with their tomfooleries?

Top of mind comes that boozer’s line of years back, that malice-reeking, “Nakatikim ka na ba ng Kinse Anyos?” Not just brandy, but that sly imagery of imbibing with someone who has yet to reach the age of reason.

Still, let’s not come to a screeching halt here only because, to some, common sense is as elusive as a date with the mythological god of sleep, Hypnos, whom Hera enlisted to lull Zeus into a deep slumber so she could tip the Trojan War in favor of the Greeks.

We’re on a roll, so might as well bulldoze our way to reclaiming our nights, our dreams (I had a keeper from when I was 10 years old, but that’s another story) and our (what?) dignity. Nah. That would be too serious.

Why not rename Epifanio de los Santos Avenue or EDSA (Extra Dose of Sleep Avenue) next since in the minds of these creative wunderkinds, the path to brand recognition is paved with poor judgment and historical apathy?

Levity aside, in the cutthroat advertising industry, there seems to be a no-holds-barred competition for who can concoct the most tone-deaf and tasteless campaign. If we can even call their apology that, well that’s as weak — more like limp — as a week-old banana.

I mean, who the hell thought this was a good idea? Did they hold a brainstorming session while under anesthesia? Or maybe they were just really, really tired of their jobs. Either way, someone needs to be fired. Or at least demoted to water cooler duty.